Hole in My Heart Podcast

Episode 62: Let’s Admit it: We’re All Addicts with Gregory Jantz

At HIMH we sometimes call ourselves "gospel addicts," but what is an addict? Author, psychologist, and addiction expert, Dr. Gregory Jantz, breaks down some of the attributes and questions we may have for ourselves or our friends on how to take steps away from the following addictions: ​
Alcohol
Food (eating too much or little)
Work
Sex/pornography
Relationships
TV/Netflix
Social Media
Because we can't help ourselves, we dive into the Die Hard debate (Christmas movie or nah?), and play a game called, "Top Toy or Misfit?" (Players have to guess which toy is a top seller this year, and which one was dubbed a danger.)
Come play and learn with us.
 
//: Highlights:
"A relapse handled properly is all about recovery--because we are learning from it." --Dr. Gregory Jantz
"[We must look in the] mirror and say, 'If I keep doing this, what is going to happen to me? What is going to happen to those I love?" --Dr. Gregory Jantz
 
//: Do the Next Thing:
Learn more about Dr. Gregory Jantz here
Find his book, Healing the Scars of Addiction, here
Take the CAGE questionnaire here
Follow on Twitter 
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Episode 61: Keeping the Kids Safe with Justin and Lindsey Holcomb

Fruit of knowing the Good News is believing that God loves kids.
He cares about their souls, he cares about their spirits, and he cares about their bodies.
That is the focus of this episode: How can we protect our children, our nieces and nephews, and our friends' kids from childhood sexual abuse? How can we do it in a way that is not "shamey"?
We explore it today with experts and authors of the important kids' book, 'God Made All of Me,' Justin and Lindsey Holcomb. (We also play a silly "Is this a Hallmark Movie or a Shmallmark Movie" game, and it turns out they are experts there, too.)
 
//: Highlights:
"We need to start talking young because 1 out of 5 kids will be victims of childhood sexual abuse before their 18th birthday."--Justin Holcomb
"[If you talk about body protection with kids] it builds a trust so that if something happens, if they are exposed to something . . . they are going know, 'Mom and Dad know about this. They talked to me about this. They are safe and understand this.'" --Lindsey Holcomb
"We are all about swimming safety, bicycle safety, wearing your helmet, getting in your your car seat, and wearing your seat belt. Add this to that: This is body safety. This is prevention and awareness. Lump it into that category, and feel empowered in your role as their advocate." --Lindsey Holcomb
 
//: Do the Next Thing:
Get the book here
Visit their website here
Follow on Justin and Lindsey on Twitter
Check them out on Facebook
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Episode 60: Walking Well as Pastors, Parents, and Therapists with Mark Yarhouse

Let's take it back to the basics and then broaden to the more complex: What does LGBTQIA mean (and why doesn't the term "homosexuals" cover it)? Where can parents take their mix of emotions when their kid comes out? Is there even a right and wrong when it comes to the gender conversation?
We are tackling some big and basic questions related to pastors, parents, and therapists today, and who better to navigate with us than Christian expert in the field, Dr. Mark Yarhouse?
Mark is Professor of Psychology at Regent University in Virginia Beach, and has published over 80 peer-reviewed journal articles and very helpful books in including, Understanding Sexual Identity: A Resource for Youth Ministers and Understanding Gender Dysphoria: Navigating Transgender Issues in a Changing Culture.
Ready? Let's go.
 
//: Highlights:
​"What happens in ministries and what happens in families is we overreact to what's above the surface . . . rather than minister to what's beneath." ---Dr. Mark Yarhouse
"A lot of times youth ministers will say, 'It's not my experience, so how can I be a trail guide?' You don't have to be Bear Grylls, you just need to be familiar with the trail. You just have to have walked the trail with other people . . . and to read up on it." --Dr. Mark Yarhouse
 
//: Do the Next Thing:
Find some of Dr. Yarhouse's Center for Faith articles on gender here
Two of Dr. Yarhouse's books we found very helpful are Understanding Sexual Identity: A Resource for Youth Ministers and Understanding Gender Dysphoria: Navigating Transgender Issues in a Changing Culture. 
Want to partner with us? Find out how you can here
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Episode 59.5: Happy T-Day 2k18 Style with the Crew

Heyyyy! Happy Thanksgiving to all of you in the United States! Happy "we are thankful for you all" if you are not in the States. In this 8-minute special we debate whether or not you put the stuffing in the turkey.
(Answer: Find Alton brown's killer recipe on the link below for turkey SANS STUFFING. Throwaway turkeys are welcome for such goodness.)
We also get a lil' bit serious on what we are thankful for. Get it here, kids. That Link: (At the bottom of the last episode): https://www.himhministries.com/blog/episode-59-a-tiny-living-act-of-obedience

Episode 59: A Tiny [Living] Act of Obedience with Ashley Auerbach

What do you get when you cross 350-square-feet, six people, a one one-eyed cat named Sirius, and an honest look at what makes up our identity? This episode.
Ashley Auerbach, a mom of four turned-tiny-living expert (whose life is soon to be featured on a TV show!), talks about obedience and the beautiful shredding it does to our perceptions of self.
We also have her figure out our tiny living problems such as how to play Cones of Dunshire in our hypothetical new RV, and what to do in said hypothetical RV if we want to buy our kids those crazy huge Costco bears for Christmas.
We laugh and get real per usual.
 
//: Highlights:
“My identity was wrapped up in what I did for people and how I entertained and how I opened my home. Because I couldn’t do any of those things my identity took a real hit. And it’s still taking a real hit.” --Ashley Auerbach
"[God] allowed these circumstances of my health to fail so I could get to the place where I would say ‘yes’ to the more he would have for me." --Ashley Auerbach
 
//: Do the Next Thing:
Follow Ashley on Instagram here or at AuerbachAdventures 
Follow here blog here
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Episode 58: If Looks Could Heal with Kelly O’Dell

Yup. We are talking about looks. Specifically, clothing. This may seem like too surface-level of a conversation for this podcast, but aren't clothes an expression of who we are? An expression of who God made us to be?
We would say, yes.
This conversation arose as I (Laurie) was stressing out way too much about what to wear on a stage. I found myself dressing for my audience as opposed to dressing as an expression of who God made me to be.
Then Kelli ODell--a friend and our Producer Steve's wife--entered the scene. She got to know my heart and helped me express it tangibly.
Now, I don't stress. I just live.
If you feel annoyingly stressed about expressing yourself tangibly via clothes, you may leave practically encouraged after listening.
 
//: Highlights:
"When you do this process and find out, 'These are my colors, these are the shapes that look good,' it simplifies your life . . . You are freed up to focus on other people. You kind of forget about yourself." --Kelli O'Dell
"So many of us see what looks cool on XYZ celebrity, and we are like, 'Okay, that is a cool look. I want to try that on.' What Kelli does is she confirms whether that particular look is right for you as an individual. Versus trying to be like someone else, it's helping you be more like who you are." --Steve O'Dell
 
//: Do the Next Thing:
Do you want to hit up Kelli for ideas for you? Email her here
For More (Including quizzes you can take!)

Episode 57: The ”Whys” Behind Pornography Addiction with Jay Stringer

If you have ever struggled with pornography addiction or are close to someone who has, please listen to this episode.
Licensed mental-health counselor, ordained minister, and author Jay Stringer, helped peel back the layers of understanding for all of us as we heard results of his nearly 4,000-person study on the "whys" behind unwanted sexual behavior.
From the research laid out in his incredible book, Unwanted, we dig into family systems that can foster certain types of lust and anger, the power of shame (and what removes it), and steps to take toward actual freedom.
And of course, Chuck Norris and some ridiculous high-fiving action make an appearance.
 
//: Highlights:
"We need to learn to listen to our lust, and see what it says about us." --Jay Stringer
"We need to begin to break some of the silence up, to say, 'Because we are made in God's image we are sexual, and that is a beautiful, stunning thing. And yet because evil cannot destroy the glory and goodness of God, evil will then go after that which most reflects God's glory and image, which is of course, our sexuality.'" --Jay Stringer
"If we are really wanting change, what does it mean to not condemn ourselves for our unwanted sexual behavior, to not hate ourselves for our sexual story, but to be kind about how it in some ways makes a lot of sense--given the life that we've had?" --Jay Stringer
 
//: Do the Next Thing:
Check out Jay's site
This site is also amazing
Get his book!
Follow him on Twitter
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Episode 56: Seven Ways To Navigate A Sexually Shifting Culture with Sam Allberry

Do you intrinsically feel the shift in culture over the last ten years or so, but you can't quite name it?
Author and pastor Sam Allberry can. ​In addition to being a really great hang, Sam lays out four cultural shifts and seven responses to those shifts on today's episode.
This is not one to miss.
 
//: Highlights:
"As I deny self I don't become less me. As I follow Jesus and deny self I become more the me God had thought up in the first place. Isn't that amazing? God can take a group of us and we all become more like Jesus, but we won't become more like each other." --Sam Allberry
"Jesus is not as easy as we think he is when it comes to these issues. That is so important to know because if they are angry at this stuff they aren't angry at Christianity, they aren't angry at me, they aren't angry at you, they aren't angry at the church. Actually, their real issue is with Jesus, and they need to realize that." --Sam Allberry
 
//: Do the Next Thing:
Listen to the talk we reference here
Look into Living Out Ministry
Check out Sam's book on some of these issues here
You can follow him on Twitter here
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Episode 55: Purity Movement or Sexual Integrity? with Jason Soucinek

If you grew up in the purity movement era of Christianity--where a lot of talk around sexuality was based on 'just say 'no' to sex before marriage'--were you burned by it? Encouraged by it?
Our friend, Jason Soucinek, executive director and founder of ProjectSix19 talks us through the benefits and detriments of talking about sexuality with a focus on this type of purity, and helps us consider another way.
We also dig into favorite group games (just don't talk about kickball kaythxsbye), get a bit crazy about being inclusive of single people, and have a giant take us to Goofball Island for reasons we still don't quite know.
 
//: Highlights:
"As a parent, you want to be Google to your children--especially when it comes to [sexuality]." --Jason Soucinek
"I think if we're only looking at two parts [fall and redemption] and we are starting with the Fall, then our language is going to be around sin, and the language of, 'no, 'bad,' and 'not good.' We'll eventually get to 'image of God' or 'Jesus' or 'forgiveness,' but that's just not the story I see taking place. It starts with, 'It was very good.'" --Jason Soucinek
 
//: Do the Next Thing:
Check out Jason's sexuality equipping ministry here
These may be especially helpful for parents:
Parent's Primer on Sexual Integrity
Parent's Primer on Internet Pornography
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Episode 54: Family Dinner with Angela Bowles

Every week, we invite people into our home for food, conversation, and games. It's basically the podcast but in real life.
My real life little sister, Angela Bowles, talks about how this works both as a biological sibling and sister in Christ.
We also discuss the first time I shared my story with Angela (on her 16th birthday?!), how we get motivated to do difficult things, and PLEASE listen to the after-closing bloopers. We guffawed.
 
//: Highlights:
"I got super convicted by my own mouth on a stage. I was talking [on a platform] about how the Church is the hope of the world, and how we need to open up our doors to anyone who needs family. It was the Holy Spirit pinpricking my heart saying, 'You got to open up your own home and invite people in.'" --Laurie Krieg
"That's why Fram Din works: It's because it's not about sexual issues necessarily, it's about being 'with.'" --Angela Bowles
"I've really loved seeing the interaction of people with our daughters. Our oldest daughter, Gwyn, is super excited: She starts praying for the family and it's all of her cousins, all of Family Dinner, and all the people she interacts with that she cares about. It's really cool to see that in her mind that they truly have been adopted into the family." --Matt Krieg
 
//: Do the Next Thing:
Check out this book: Family on Mission!
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